Since my mom was still finishing college while I was growing up, my grandparents pretty much raised me. When I was sick, my grandpa would boil hot water and squeeze kalamansi into the cup for me to drink. He always did this for me when I was sick, and I'm not sure why, but it was the best remedy for any ailments I had. I can almost imagine him preparing this, perched over the stove, watching the water while cutting fresh kalamansi.
With the chaos of the past few days--all of which seemingly have meshed into an infinite amount of hours, my body is worn out. I haven't been sleeping for more than four hours at a time, and when I wake up, it's go-go-go. It probably didn't help that I walked around in the rain yesterday running errands and such. I also tend to forget to eat. Believe me, with my schedule the way it is, it's hard to remember to eat something. Every morning I have two organic, whole wheat, flax seed waffles. And since I'm full in the morning, I forget to eat anything else during the day.
When I woke up this morning I felt sick but pushed myself to get ready and get to campus early to work on some papers before class. I got my work done, went to class and by my third (out of five) class, I could literally feel the heat coming from out of my eyes, my headache intensified and for some reason my ear began to ache. I left in the middle of class because I seriously thought that I might honestly just collapse by the end of the day.
After spending a pretty ridiculous amount of money on soup, nyquil and other things at the store, I realized all I really want is a warm cup of water infused with kalamansi. It's been a really long time since I've missed my grandpa. I mean, I miss him everyday but with how non-stop my life has been, I haven't taken the time to really miss him. Until right now.
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Meow and a Mini Family Reunion
Yesterday I met up with my cousins, Jannie and Joanna, from California...in Evanston. I haven't seen them in more than ten years. We used to spend summers in California, oh the memories. The matching outfits, the daylong games of tong its, backyard barbecues, and (gasp) a choreographed dance skit birthday gift? It was so good catching up, we've appointed Jannie as reunion coordinator, we figured either Denver or Vegas for the location, although c'mon, who wouldn't pick Vegas?! Let's hope it's not another ten years. Family is love, that's all.
Lol at this guys. Was her name really Meow?
(Note: Now that I've been looking at this, I'm guessing it might actually the program that prints the receipts, that's more probable huh? Either way, we still got a good laugh.)
Lol at this guys. Was her name really Meow?
(Note: Now that I've been looking at this, I'm guessing it might actually the program that prints the receipts, that's more probable huh? Either way, we still got a good laugh.)
Monday, September 29, 2008
Letter to myself
Dear Natasha, (age 17)
Please remember not to judge people at face value. Looks aren't everything and yours will fade. Know that the unrelenting pain you feel when you think of him will end. It will take three years, but you will stop loving him. He, however, will not stop loving you and he will do everything in his power to remind you of this. Be strong. You will throw away every picture. You will also throw away his basketball shirt, his lacrosse shirt and his football shirt. Find something else to sleep in. Don't makeout with complete strangers, you're not that kind of girl. Stop selling yourself short, give yourself only to those who inspire you. Let people in. Don't be so cynical about life and love. Quit going to bed with your makeup on. Try not to be so impulsive...with your spending, with your choice in men, with your lifestyle in general. It's not healthy. You will be the other woman. Don't let it happen again. You'll give one too many eulogies, prepare yourself for the worst kind of heartache ever imaginable, you'll piece it back together eventually. Family is forever. That is unconditional. They will always love you, when you forget this (and you will), all you need to do is ask because sometimes you just need to hear that someone loves you. Turn your cell phone off at night. When you go to bed, so does your phone. No one important will text you in the middle of the night, and the ones that do only do so because you leave it on. No, you didn't love Eric, but let him down easy. Consider his feelings as if they were your own. You and Justin are incompatible for the long term. It doesn't matter how much your mom liked him or how much he will compromise to make you happy. In college you'll find your soulmate. Her name is Francesca. Smile more, strangers think you look like a bitch. They're right. Slow down, once you get going you tend not to stop. Your body is tired, let it rest. Go to more poetry readings. Save your Kenneth Koch anthology in a safe place. Put your great-grandmother's diamond in your safety deposit box. Damnit, stop procrastinating. Surround yourself with people who truly know you, who want to get to know you, and who accept you for you. Ask questions. Curiosity is knowledge, don't ever forget that. You'll never stop learning, appreciate this. Stop collecting half-filled glasses of water in your bedroom. When it matters most, be sure to say how you really feel. You won't, but still promise to try. You'll stop writing for a little over a year for several reasons. These are not reasons. They are excuses. Know that you will snap out of this and begin writing again. Lastly, wait for someone worthy. Someone who will be the best part of your day. Someone who will make your dreams his dreams and vice versa.
Love,
Natasha (age 22)
Please remember not to judge people at face value. Looks aren't everything and yours will fade. Know that the unrelenting pain you feel when you think of him will end. It will take three years, but you will stop loving him. He, however, will not stop loving you and he will do everything in his power to remind you of this. Be strong. You will throw away every picture. You will also throw away his basketball shirt, his lacrosse shirt and his football shirt. Find something else to sleep in. Don't makeout with complete strangers, you're not that kind of girl. Stop selling yourself short, give yourself only to those who inspire you. Let people in. Don't be so cynical about life and love. Quit going to bed with your makeup on. Try not to be so impulsive...with your spending, with your choice in men, with your lifestyle in general. It's not healthy. You will be the other woman. Don't let it happen again. You'll give one too many eulogies, prepare yourself for the worst kind of heartache ever imaginable, you'll piece it back together eventually. Family is forever. That is unconditional. They will always love you, when you forget this (and you will), all you need to do is ask because sometimes you just need to hear that someone loves you. Turn your cell phone off at night. When you go to bed, so does your phone. No one important will text you in the middle of the night, and the ones that do only do so because you leave it on. No, you didn't love Eric, but let him down easy. Consider his feelings as if they were your own. You and Justin are incompatible for the long term. It doesn't matter how much your mom liked him or how much he will compromise to make you happy. In college you'll find your soulmate. Her name is Francesca. Smile more, strangers think you look like a bitch. They're right. Slow down, once you get going you tend not to stop. Your body is tired, let it rest. Go to more poetry readings. Save your Kenneth Koch anthology in a safe place. Put your great-grandmother's diamond in your safety deposit box. Damnit, stop procrastinating. Surround yourself with people who truly know you, who want to get to know you, and who accept you for you. Ask questions. Curiosity is knowledge, don't ever forget that. You'll never stop learning, appreciate this. Stop collecting half-filled glasses of water in your bedroom. When it matters most, be sure to say how you really feel. You won't, but still promise to try. You'll stop writing for a little over a year for several reasons. These are not reasons. They are excuses. Know that you will snap out of this and begin writing again. Lastly, wait for someone worthy. Someone who will be the best part of your day. Someone who will make your dreams his dreams and vice versa.
Love,
Natasha (age 22)
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